Hiya! Savannah Here!
As many of you already know, I am an official FBI Agent (Feline Bureau of Investigation) and known inside the agency as Agent 0.17…and I have a reputation as a ladycat with some international experience.
So it is amazing to me that my snoopervisor, Agent Kozmo , has never called on me to help with his recent troubles in locating his catnapped girl furriend, Callie (given her whining I can’t imagine why he would try to find her, but each to his own…).
Anywho, I was hanging out on our bed this week, playing a fitness video on my iPad (gives me new moves for my fitness recovery program)
…I really like doing floor workouts…
…then, I heard my incoming email bell. I quickly checked…and Holy Catfish! It was a message from FBI HQ!!!
I quickly shut down my game and read the message…it was about some dude flying in from China names Xui Ooi, bringing 6 of his wives and 16 kittens with him. Hmmmmm…wonder why that matters???? Anyways, HQ tells me that Agent Kozmo will be in touch with more information.
Then I hear the incoming email ping again…IT’S KOZMO! FINALLY!…
…he has more leads about Callie’s catnapper…all he has known up ‘til now is that it is one of Nellie’s exe’s who likes eggrolls.
Oh Cat! Kozmo tells me that this dude, Xui Ooi, arrived in the USA about a week before Callie went missing and he was actually IN HOUSTON the day she disappeared!!!…(wipes brow…starting to perspire(vocab builder project VBP)…
Koz tells me to get to San Francisco lickity split…(is that fast???)…and try to like hang out with the wives.
So I grab a ticket at my local BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) train station…
… and stroll through the entrance…
…casual like…no hurry…can’t draw any attention…
Then I go straight to the Mandarin Oriental where Xui Ooi and his family are hanging out; they have a Signature Mandarin King Suite…hmmmm…now I know Callie would just luvluvluv that…hmmmmm…wonder who made that reservation????
Anyways, sorry for the digression…I know Kozmo has already been in San Francisco with Agent Spitty but to no avail…sigh..
So I decide to go undercover to the spa close to the Mandarin Oriental Hotel…hoping to meet one of the wives…and SUCCESS!!! Ariva shows up for a mani, pedi…and we have a nice long cat chat…
We agree to have a shopping spree together with a couple of the other wives the next day, so I grab a hotel room in San Francisco, at the Mark Hopkins. Then the next day we meet up outside Neiman Marcus to do some serious shopping!
We all just luvluvluv designer stuff…and the FBI approved a $4000 USD expense for maintaining my cover…WOO HOO…ahem…I mean…I just had to spend, right???…to keep my cover, right???
And then I take the wives to my fave BLING shopping spot…TIFFANY’S!!
…well!!…who knew what coincidences were happening!…I get back to my room…and Kozmo has sent me a photo taken from a store security cam…and guess where it was taken???? and who was in it????? Go on, guess????…(tapping nail up, down, up, down…waiting for readers to guess…)
…OK…here it is!!!….
…CALLIE!! Efurrybody knows she is addicted to BLING and look at her…trying to go unnoticed in that little hot pink hat number…and check out the dude in front of her….hmmmmmm….betcha’ Nellie will recognize him…maybe even Kozmo will!
So, I arrange for Xui and his two wives Ariva and Phi to meet with me and my husband (Koz in undercover role) at the Mandarin Brasserie for niptinis, shaken not stirred. I hope that Kozmo can detect whether or not Xui has Callie or perhaps aided in her abduction (VBP).
Being the skilled and experienced international ladycat agent that I am…when we meet Xui, I present him with my personal identification card (no, I was not dumb enough to give him my FBI ID! sheesh!)…Xui is stunned that I show him honor by using the proper wayof presenting my card…I hold the two top edges in my paws, with the writing facing Xui and present it to him as I bow…then I use my paw, NOT JUST ONE CLAW, to direct them all over to the table I have reserved…(pretty cool huh?!)
Poor Kozmo, he is so overcome and distraught…he BREAKS COVER and blurts out to Xui “why did you scruff my Callie like some dirt bag catnapper???”…I reach over and stroke Koz’ ruffled hackles and smooth his tail back to its proper size…then Xui speaks…
“I only remember Peni from years ago on a ski trip to Whistler…I asked her to be my 3rd wife then and she turned me down…she was not yet ready to settle down…then she left me”.
So, I thanked Xui and Ariva and Phi, and Koz and I headed back across the bay on BART to my place.
Back to the iPad and more research…poor Kozmo had another dead end to face and still no idea of Callie’s current whereabouts…Kozmo finally hopped into my transportation vortex, decidedly more creative than his, and headed home…(whispers behind paw…he was so anxious I had to whisper encouragement in his ears as he left…and he squuueeeed in worry over Callie…)
I grabbed some much needed shut eye in my office bed…whew…what a whirlwind few days…and my first ever FBI assignment!!!
Paw pats, Savannah
Savannah's Paw Tracks 